7 Things you should never do in the first month of dating with women
First dates are important because they’re when you make your first impression and hopefully show your date that you’re a great guy they want to see again. A bad impression will keep you single so you need to know what to do on first dates and how to keep things going smoothly during the first month of dating so it’ll turn into a relationship. This means having the right conversation starters, avoiding sensitive subjects like wanting a wedding or family, not smothering them with affection and keeping a realistic view of your relationship with them.
1) Make them the center of your world
First dates are exciting because you’re meeting someone new and your mind is full of possibilities for where it could lead to. If you hit it off with them and want to keep seeing them you’re going to become a bit obsessive because you want to spend more time with them and make sure they don’t lose interest in you. You’ll constantly text them, arrange more dates and ask tons of questions because you want to know everything about them and they’ll be all that you think about. This will make them feel smothered and they won’t want to date you so you need to keep your emotions under control. Tell them that you’re attracted to them and want to see them again but don’t go overboard and wait for them to make the next move. This will keep you focused on how things really are between the two of you and you won’t quickly fall in love to only end up getting your heart broken.
2) Recreating perfect first dates
Recreating perfect first dates is something you may be tempted to do if yours went well and you want to keep having a great dates with them so you plan each date carefully so that everything goes perfect. You’ll forget about the important thing which is making an emotional and mental bond with them and get wrapped up in trying to have a fairytale relationship. You shouldn’t do this though because you’re setting yourself up to fail and they’re going to notice that instead of the relationship progressing it’s standing still because you’re still stuck in the mind set of first dates. It’s okay if your other dates aren’t perfect or exciting because you’re supposed to be using this time getting to know each other and learning how to be comfortable around one another.
3) Introduce them to the people who are important to you
First dates and the weeks that follow are supposed to be about the two of you and seeing if you’re compatible as a couple so the last thing you should be doing is introducing them to your friends and family. You can use them as conversation starters because they’re important to you and gives your date an idea of the kind of people you have in your life but they shouldn’t meet them until you’re in an established relationship. If they meet these people in the first month of dating then they’re going to think you’re moving too fast and that you’re taking things more seriously than they are. They’re not going to be ready for this and will want to end things before it gets too uncomfortable for them. If you really want them to meet your friends then after a month or two of dating you could go on a group date with a bunch of friends and their partners so your date can feel at ease instead of being the center of attention.
4) Mention wanting a wedding or children
Mentioning wanting a wedding or having children one day are not conversations starters for first dates and shouldn’t even be talked about until you’ve been with this person for a long time. You may be at the stage of life where these things are important to you and you want to settle down but you need to do them with the right person and first dates aren’t when you decide this. Conversation starters for first dates should be lighthearted and interesting because you want to have fun and keep the mood good. You need to stick to conversations starters like asking about hobbies, pets or what they do for a living so you can get to know them and decide if they’re right for you.
5) Show your new relationship status online
It’s easy to get caught up in the excitement of a new relationship but you shouldn’t update your relationship status on social media sites during the first month. It’s okay to mention first dates because it’s interesting and you’ll want your friends to know it went well but then you should keep your dating life quiet until you know if it’s going to turn into something more serious. You also shouldn’t add your date to your friends list straight away because they might get the wrong idea and feel you’re rushing things or they may see an embarrassing post you made about how much you love them and wish you had kept your feelings for them more private. You should wait for them to add you as a friend and update your relationship status after they update theirs.
6) Hide who you really are
Everyone acts like a better version of themselves on first dates because they want to make a good impression but you need to be careful that you don’t take this too far and hide who you really are. If you present a perfect version of yourself then your date is going to think you’re really like that and you’re going to have to live up to their ideal on all of your other dates with them. To make a good impression but still be yourself then act polite, show an interest in what they have to say and be honest when you talk to them.
7) Expect them to love you as much as you love them
If you quickly fall in love during the first month of dating then you need to keep it to yourself and try to dampen your desire because it’s unrealistic to think they feel the same way. You’re going to push them away if you act like you’re a couple in a committed relationship or that there’s a strong passion between you. You need to slow down and let the relationship happen naturally so both of you feel like it’s going at the right pace
She is working as writer for diferent websites. She has published many hand-books about adult dating and relationships.
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