11 Signs you’re dating an insufferable egomaniac
Dating a narcissist who craves constant adulation can be a tiring experience that leaves you feeling unfulfilled and unloved. Think about how your partner acts and whether or not they’re an insufferable egomaniac that needs to get out of your life.
1) They expect constant adulation
A narcissist expects constant adulation because they have an over-inflated opinion of themselves and thinks everyone sees them as an amazing person. When they don’t get enough attention, they feel ignored and will say or do something to make themselves feel better and to provoke a response out of you. You’ll notice that they’re nicer to you the more you compliment them and agree with everything they say and you’ll be on edge about doing something that will upset them.
2) They’re always taking selfies
They’ll take selfies and post them online to show off to their friends and will brag about the wonderful meal they had but won’t mention you because they don’t want attention taken away from them. When they get a haircut or a new outfit they’ll post a bunch of photos online so their friends can complement them but rarely will they post a picture of you unless it’s because they did something nice for you and want the credit.
3) They act like you’re always wrong
A narcissist thinks they’re perfect and don’t believe they do anything wrong so they’ll try to find someone else to blame. Since you’re dating them they’ll use blame you and guilt you into believing that they’re right. They’ll tell you it’s your fault over and over again while listing all the ways it is your fault so you feel like you can’t defend yourself. Over time you’ll automatically accept the blame because you’ll be used to being treated like a failure and you’re self-confidence will be a lot lower than it was before you started dating them.
4) They react badly to criticism
They only want adulation and can’t handle criticism because it goes against how they feel about themselves. If you criticism them, even in a gentle way, they’ll react badly. They might lose their temper or find a way to upset you so you learn that it’s a bad idea to say anything bad about them. You’ll want to avoid having a fight so you stop telling them when they’ve done something wrong and will give them constant adulation to stay on their good side. They don’t understand that constructive criticism can be a good thing and see all of it as you being against them.
5) They fake being nice
A narcissist has to fake being nice because they only care about themselves and sees other people are being inferior which makes them lack genuine feelings towards them. You’ll get the feeling that when they’re nice it’s only an act and that they’re behaving that way because it’s expected of them. There will be times when you doubt their love for you and when you try to make them show affection towards you they’ll act like it’s a chore. Now and again you’ll see the real version of them but you’ll tell yourself that they’re just having a bad day and aren’t really like that. You’ll make lots of excuses for them or overlook things because you want to believe that the fake version of them is based on reality.
6) They care about making a good impression
Everyone wants to make a good impression on people but a narcissist will obsess over this because they want to be seen as perfect all the time. They’ll spend lots of time taking care of their physical appearance by going for regular haircuts and gym sessions as well as spending money on the latest fashion trends. They’ll go to the nicest restaurants and go on fancy vacations so they can brag about what they’ve done so people see them as an attractive, adventurous and well rounded.
7) They only care about themselves
They are only capable of truly caring about themselves and fake their emotions for other people, including you, because it’s the only way they know how to live. When you’re dating them everything will be about them and what they want and you’ll feel like they don’t love you as much as you love them. They’ll talk about how their day at work went or about a problem they’re having with a friend but they won’t think to ask about how you’re doing. They don’t care about what’s going on with you because you’re just there to keep them company and make them feel important.
8) They don’t invest themselves in the relationship
They will always see themselves as the only important part of the relationship because they don’t truly love you and know that they can always find someone else if you break up with them. This means they will make a minimum effort to keep the relationship going and you’ll be the one who does all of the work. Things that are important to you don’t matter to them and they’ll forget things you care about like special work projects, a work promotion, a favourite restaurant or anniversaries.
9) They don’t help other people
You’ll notice that they always expect people to help them but they won’t help others. You’ll be embarrassed by this behaviour because it’ll be obvious that they don’t care and you’ll be the one to help while apologizing for your partner’s attitude. They’re not trying to be rude, it just doesn’t occur to them that helping is the right thing to do but they expect others to want to help them because they think everyone loves them.
10) They obsess over their appearance
A narcissist thinks they’re the best person in the world and will obsess over themselves. They want people to recognize how amazing they are and to receive lots of compliments so they’ll spend ages looking after their appearance. They go to the gym regularly, indulge in spray tans and manicures, and buy expensive clothes. How they look is more important to them than anything else and they want to be the most attractive person in the room.
11) They never take responsibility
Since narcissists believe they’re perfect and blame others for things that go wrong they avoid taking responsibility. If something goes wrong they’ll pretend they don’t know anything about it or they’ll stay away until the situations gets resolved. When someone tries to force them to take responsibility they’ll get defensive and will do whatever they can to take the focus off themselves.
She is working as writer for diferent websites. She has published many hand-books about adult dating and relationships.
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