Online dating advice: 8 Ways to stop texting and go on a date
Online dating can be tough to do successfully because of distance and you need to be able to move from one type of relationship, an informal one, to a serious one that involves more time and effort. This isn’t going to happen if you act passive about it and just hope that things will magically progress between the two of you. To go from casual texting to actually being able to go on a date you need to take control of the situation and convince the other person that it’s time to take things to the next level otherwise things are going to burn out and you’re going to have to start all over again by finding someone new to meet.
1) Tell them you want to meet
Tell them you enjoy talking to them and want to go on a date so that you can get to know them better or that you’re dying to meet them. This forces them to decide if they want to meet you or if they’re not ready for that just yet. Give them an idea of when you’re free so they can choose what day and time works best for them and wait for a few days to get a response before bringing it up again.
2) Ask if they’re ready to meet
Texting is safe because it’s not as personal as talking face to face and it’s easy to quickly send a message during the day so it’s not a big time commitment. The person you’re talking to may rarely go from texting to meeting in person because it scares them so you can help them by giving them control of the situation. This makes them feel more confident and there’s a better chance of them willing to go on a date with you. Ask them if they’re ready to meet and make sure you’re free when they make a suggestion for a date and if they’re not ready yet you can ask what they need from you in order to move closer to that step.
3) Hint about wanting more
When you’re texting with someone you don’t want to come across as too aggressive, which is easy to do since there’s no body language to judge meaning. If you want to avoid sending the wrong message you can hint about wanting to go on a date and wait for them to make the first move. Tell them that you can’t wait to meet them or that you bet you’ll have even more fun together when hanging out in person then don’t mention it again. When they say they’d like to meet you too then you can make a date with them.
4) Give them a timeline
Online dating is something that can drag on forever without the relationship going anywhere because some people use it as a fun distraction and they don’t feel the same pressure to move things along faster like they do when they try to hookup in person. They may not realize that it’s dragging along and are thinking that things are great the way they are. You can stop this from happening by gently suggesting a timeline for your interactions and say that you don’t mind texting for a couple of weeks but you’re serious about meeting and want to go on a date before too long.
5) Suggest date ideas
The person you’re talking to may be relying on texting to interact with you because they’re not sure how to take things to the next step and are waiting for you to suggest something. You can try to speed things up by texting them some date ideas, like going to the movies or the beach for a picnic, and ask if they’re interested in doing that with you or send a link to a local activity that you think they may enjoy. You can also ask if they have any date ideas and work together to arrange when you can go on a date.
6) Make them fantasize
It’s hard to gauge what someone’s like in person when you’re online dating because you’re judging them based on words and pictures, there’s little emotion involved and this creates a feeling that it’s not that serious. You can make them eager about meeting you by getting their imagination going about how great it will be. When you’re texting them you can take things to a sexual level by using dirty talk or sending them naughty pictures but don’t be too revealing. You want them to fantasize about all the kinky sex they can have with you so don’t go too far with the dirty talk and never send a naked picture that shows all of your body.
7) Be on the same page
After awhile of online dating you need to talk to the other person and make sure that both of you are on the same page. Ask them where they see the relationship heading and share your thoughts on it so they understand what you want. They may be only texting you with no hint of meeting you because they’re unsure of how you feel and they don’t want to rush you. Once they know that you want the same things as they do they’ll be more willing to figure out when they can go on a date with you.
8) Play hard to get
Playing hard to get is a good way to show someone that you’re not always going to be there when they want you to be and they need to take things more seriously if they want to date you. Instead of texting them back right away you should wait until the next day to send a reply or you can casually mention being busy lately or that you can’t believe how many messages you’re still getting from other users on the online dating site. This lets them know that you’re not waiting around for them and that you have a life that doesn’t involve them which makes them feel left out. This motivates them to go on a date with you and see if there’s a real connection that can lead to dating in real life.
She is working as writer for diferent websites. She has published many hand-books about adult dating and relationships.
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